It can now be written.
Back in November I got the idea of knitting winter hats in the Unionville High School colors, navy blue and gold, as Christmas gifts for two family members. I went to Walmart to buy the yarn, knowing they stock sturdy, washable yarns in a kaleidoscopic assortment of colors.
Too kaleidoscopic, in fact: I couldn't decide which was the perfect blue. I asked a fellow yarn shopper for help, but she had never heard of Unionville (I know; imagine!). I had better luck when I asked three nearby sales clerks. Not only had they heard of Unionville, but they even called up the UHS website and held up skeins of yarn next to the computer screen to get the closest possible match.
Excellent customer service --- and the hats turned out perfectly.