The Windsors

My friends in England are astonished at the interest some of us Americans are showing in Prince William's engagement to Kate Middleton. My college friend George, who lives near Portsmouth, sees the engagement as an attempt to divert attention from England's economic woes. Although he'll have April 29 off from work as a national holiday, he says he'll refuse to watch the wedding and instead will treat himself to a special lunch at his local "carvery."

If Prince Charles abdicates in favor of his son, don't you think he and Camilla would be perfectly happy having a country place in Unionville? It looks a lot like rural England here. They'd have their choice of excellent hunts and polo teams to join. They could plant an organic garden. Paparazzi and protesting students wouldn't make the trek all the way out here, and goodness knows we locals would keep our mouths shut about their comings and goings. (After all, if Chadds Ford can keep mum about having Martha Stewart as a neighbor, so can we.)

Slates

This is the time of year when nonprofit groups' nominating committees are scurrying around trying to sweet-talk (or strong-arm) people into serving as officers for the coming year. Who's the best candidate for president? Do we need to change the by-laws to allow the treasurer an additional term? What arguments are most likely to be most convincing -- or will a nice lunch do the trick?
But mostly it comes down to one critical question: Who will say "yes"?
(And, of course, conversely: How do we discourage potential loose cannons from throwing their hat into the ring? Answer: Emphasize the thankless, contentious, time-consuming, stress-inducing nature of the position.)
A lot of behind-the-scenes work goes on before you read that happy press release in the paper about, "XYZ Community Group is looking forward to another great year serving our wonderful town with its new officers."

Device

I am in awe of the clever person who invented this little gadget for fastening those tiny bracelet clasps. It's a six-inch-long wooden dowel with an alligator clip fastened to one end. The clip holds one end of the clasp steady, leaving your dominant hand free to fasten the bracelet.
(I searched online for the maker, TKO Technology out of Clearwater, Florida, but couldn't find a listing. You could probably make your own without too much problem.)

Your government at work

Last week, while doing some paperwork, I was asked to show my Social Security card. This card has been resting on the bottom of the Brandywine since a 1983 canoeing mishap, and I've never needed it until now. So I went to the Social Security website (http://www.ssa.gov/), printed out a simple, one-page form for a replacement card and took it to the closest Social Security office (for me, 1101 West Chester Pike, which is in the shopping center east of Five Points Road, across from the Golf Club Apartments).
I walked in on a Thursday afternoon, was called to the desk almost immediately, showed my driver's license to the friendly employee --  and that was that. She printed me a temporary form, and I should get my card in early January.
I was out of there in 10 minutes. Could not have been easier.

Book Sale

The gigantic annual Used Book Sale sponsored by the Unionville High School PTO will be held at the high school gym Friday, Feb. 25, from 5 to 9 p.m. and Saturday, Feb. 26, from 9 a.m. to 2:30 p.m., with the $8-a-bag discount to follow from 3 to 5 p.m.
Neighborhood book collection will be at 9 a.m. Saturday, Jan. 29, and books can be dropped off at any district school starting Jan. 31. "Books that are moldy or smelly, have torn covers or missing pages, or have been nibbled on by the family pet cannot be sold,"  notes the website, http://www.uhsbooksale.org/.
Right now the volunteers are looking for "bags with handles to aid in book collection"; bags can be left in the marked boxes at any of the district elementary schools.
Also, student and adult volunteers can register on the website for a 2-hour work shift.

Country mouse

This is a little embarrassing. I had to take my car into the dealership, again, because the "check engine" light kept coming on. I gave them a mildly hard time for failing to locate and fix the problem.
Well, it turns out that the problem was, as the service guy put it, "rodents." Field mice in the garage had built a bowl-size nest in one of the wheel wells, chewed through a vapor recovery line and nestled comfortably into the back-seat upholstery. The repair guys spent most of the day removing the back seat and the fuel tank to get rid of all the mouse debris (which included half of a dog biscuit!). They thoughtfully saved everything in a plastic bag, in case the insurance claims people need to see it.
I drive my car almost every day, so these are some industrious rodents, fashioning a nest overnight. But, as my amused insurance agent wondered, why didn't they make their nest near the warm engine?
I mentioned this rodent issue at a party, sparking a lively discussion: two men said they had had the exact same problem. Mice, it seems, like to chew on plastic.
So what to use as a deterrent? We have busy mousetraps in the garage, but apparently that's not enough. I've started storing the dog biscuits in a jar. I've also heard that mothballs are a deterrent.

Icy

Here are a couple of belated stories from the first snowfall of the season, two weeks ago.
Late afternoon on Dec. 16 a car spun out at Embreeville Road and Brandywine Creek Road in Newlin Township and slid into a house. According to the Po-Mar-Lin Fire Company's website, "the impact left a large hole in the foundation of the house."
The next day, Po-Mar-Lin got a call that a horse had walked out onto a frozen pond at 540 Bartram Road in West Marlborough -- and then had fallen through the ice. When the rescue crew arrived, the horse was being pulled out of the water.
Speaking of firefighters: send your local fire company a generous check if you can possibly manage it. These good men and women go out at all hours and in all weather conditions (see above) to accidents and fires, as well as spending hours of their own time doing training, fund-raising and other company activities throughout the year -- all without pay.

Loogie oogie oogie

I'm reading a book about how brain networks produce emotions in response to perceptions, and the author uses "disgust" as an example of a primary emotion that "may have evolved as a mechanism to assess whether something in the environment is edible or noxious."
I thought of this today when I saw a man park his silver Audi on State Street in the center of Kennett, get out, lock his car doors -- and then proceed to spit on the sidewalk.
I'm not a terribly squeamish person -- scat of many types holds no horrors for me -- but I've gotta say, that's pretty disgusting. Not to mention unhygienic, disrespectful and just plain gross.
Got phlegm? Spit it into a tissue, for goodness' sake! I'll give you one, I promise.

Bubble and squeak

The popular Springdell restaurant/tavern The Whip will be the subject of a zoning hearing at 7 p.m. Monday, Dec. 27, at the West Marlborough Township building in Doe Run. In the latest chapter of an ongoing dispute, a group of Springdell neighbors are arguing that the Whip is operating in violation of numerous township zoning regulations. Two additional zoning hearings are set for January.