I was flipping through the radio stations the other day and caught a radio preacher on the Lancaster religious station reading excerpts from the Song of Solomon and explaining some of the Old Testament phrases that sound odd to modern ears. He was pretty funny -- while of course still being respectful toward those beautiful verses of love.
"Your hair is like a flock of goats, moving down the slopes of Gilead," he read. "Your teeth are like a flock of shorn ewes that have come up from the washing, all of which bear twins." He speculated on the reaction a modern husband might get if he compared his wife's hair to a flock of goats.
Switching to the wife's point of view, he continued, "His arms are rounded gold, set with jewels. His body is ivory work, encrusted with sapphires. His legs are alabaster columns, set upon bases of gold."
The preacher paused. "In other words: he's ripped."
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